FEATURES
67 NASCAR MANIA '06 LET'S GO RACING!
You may be afraid to drive in the left lane, but new kid Carl Edwards,
veteran Jeff Gordon, and the rest of NASCAR still let it all hang out.
Get set for the new season of our most ass-hauling sport.
74 QUIZ MASTER HOW DID HE DO THAT?
Women have been known to rate how appealing men are (talk about shallow!).
Find out if you're one of the "good ones," or at least"not
utterly repulsive ones."
78 MAXIM FIELD GUIDE MAN VS. NATURE!
We honor the timeless battle between the great outdoors and complete morons.
(Note:The great outdoors wins.)
82 HOT GIRLFRIEND JENNIFER SCHOLLE
Tennis player James Blake may not be number one in the world, but the
lady on his arm is without equal (take that, Roger Federer!). Discover
the woman who makes us interested in men's tennis.
86 FEMME FATALE BITE OF THE BLACK WIDOW
She was able to adjust to a new land and still swindle dozens of innocent
people out of a cool million. Meet the Iranian who will destroy your trust
in strippers. (Can't we have anything nice?)
98 WE WANT ANSWERS! FRED WILLARD
The man who shall forever alter how you look at the romantic comedy in
his new film Date Movie gives the lowdown on his roles in Waiting
for Guffman and This Is Spinal Tap, passing on the lead
in Airplane!, and why celebrity baseball can be such a magical
thing. Reason #1:You get to see Tony Danza bleed.
56 SHOW TIME! Valentine's Day is back, so chec out the lingerie that ensures
your gal will be underdressed for the occasion. REGULARS
106 MAXIM STYLE LESS THAN ZERO
We've got all the paraphernalia, from gloves to goggles and sweaters to
snow pants, for braving the cruel elements. Now let's get through winter
without losing any more extremities (miss you, toes).
12 READERS' LETTERS WHAT ARE YOU SAYING?
Because you have to share your hopes and fears with someone (and your
girl is sick and tired of hearing about that crap).
18 THE FUNNIES LAUGH, STUPID!
Brian Fischler attempts to convince us that legal blindness isn't just
a scam to score some free canes and a dog.
20 CIRCUS MAXIMUS FLAME ON!
We offer pictures proving everything is better when you set it on fire,
discover how San Francisco would look if it had been constructed entirely
out of Jell-O, and give a quiz to a campus cutie.
32 HOW TO CONQUER HER SEX FEARS
Then learn how to joust so you'll be ready to fight off her father when
her parents realize how deeply you've warped their little princess.
44 HOT ZONE HAVE YOU SEEN THIS GIRL?
Sheetal Sheth guides us through Looking for Comedy in the Muslim World
—Yemen is such a cutup!—while we listen to Snoop Dogg's latest,
watch The Constant Gardener DVD, and play Full Auto on our Xbox 363. Also,
we get ready for the fifth season of 24 (a.k.a. day five). Don't worry,
counterterrorist superagent Jack Bauer, you've damn near reached the weekend!
101 TOP GEAR ON THE MOVIE
Thanks to Apple's brand-new video iPod, you shall no longer have to listen
to or even look at the people around you. Up yours, loving family!
124 ASK US ANYTHING DO HUmma-porn-star">UmaNS HAVE WHITE AND DARK MEAT?
And after Hannibal Lecter ruins it for everyone by just blurting out the
answer, find out if the solution to our hurricane problem is an A-bomb.
38 TOTAL HOTNESS In the interests of showing you as many smokin' women
as hUmma-porn-star">Umanly possible, we present the new Total Hotness section. You're
welcome!