FEATURES 58 QUOTE, UNQUOTE Robert Plant
Hail the man who brought goblins, warlocks and Stonehenge to rock.
60 BONDING
SLUMBER PARTY!
The boys of Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn treat FHM's pad like a diaper.
64 SWEET SALVATION Jenna Jameson
Our swollen mail sack finds relief.
70 MASTER CLASS
DIRECTED BY ISAAC!
More proof that he's a juggernaut of sexual know-how.
74 JACKED UP
JENNIE BERNTSON
Plumber's crack held little appeal until we saw the star of In a Fix.
78 FLASHBACK
COMEDIAN REDEMPTION
Being a member of the has-been club does have its privileges.
80 FAKE WAR
REBELS WITHOUT APPLAUSE
These poor saps honor Civil War heroes by playing dress-up.
86 MENTORINC
THE COMEDIANS' GUIDE TO LIFE
Who better to dish out important life advice than a bunch of comic misanthropes?
92 COVER GIRLS
THE X GIRLS
Hot and extreme no longer refer to just chicken wings.
102 QUOTE, UNQUOTE
THE ASTRONAUT
Sure, China sent a man to space— but this guy watched porn on Mir. IN EVERY ISSUE
14 LETTERS
Vida is celebrated in flesh, reader nipples defy God, Old School's wedding singer
spouts obscenities and hot pumpkin-carving action!
18 REPORTER
The sizzling Amerie Rogers, lessons with the littlest Nerd, a supersized swine,
bullet-riddled sports gear and employees raid The Boss's Desk.
41 REVIEWS
The latest music, movies and games, plus Cedric cuts us up—literallyKylie
Minogue gets saucy and Fred Savage lives!
107 FASHION
Even when you're not on the slopes, that's no reason to drop the edgy look. Plus,
a load of styling sneaks for every occasion.
126 GASOLINE
The ultimate two-wheeled rocket, plowing Mother Nature, Ice Cube's insights and
special time with Edmonton's Jason CHimera.
132 BIONIC
Get snowboarding tips from pubescent X Games champ Shaun White, and Apolo Ohno
drops the science on steely thighs and taut buttocks. ADDED VALUE
56 BAR ROOM JOKES
Readers take a breather this month as comedy pros take the stage and unleash their
arsenal of devastating zingers.
136 TRUE STORIES
We thought our readers were twisted—then we read these sickening tales harvested
from the depths of coriedians' polluted minds.