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EDITORIAL NOTE
COUPLES... COUPLES... COUPLES...
It has become increasingly more obvious that more couples are staying together
these days. The reasons (other than love) are safety and economics.
Two people living together is not cheaper than one, but is considerably cheaper
than two living separately. If a couple breaks up and they go their separate ways,
it means two of just about everything. One was sufficient when both were in the
same apartment or house, but not anymore. And we are not talking about personal
items here. We're talking about essentials.
Older men with younger lovers are in a rather awkward position as they reach senior
citizen status. The fear of leaving the world begins to show up when one is approaching
the seventies and eighties and they have to think about the loved one they will
leave behind. Will the survivor be taken core of? Will the survivor end up looking
for another lover? Will the other lover be unsafe? It is a situation that changes
according to the amount of self control and will power available to the survivor.
Financially, many have mode provisions for their partners through Living Trusts
being set up by reputable attorneys, and in most states the trusts are being honored.
In Hawaii while I write this, the law to allow some six marriages is being upheld.
What we have to worry about is what the other states and the federal government
will do to honor such a marriage. The other night I had this terrible dream
about the entire gay population moving to Hawaii. Is there enough room for all
of us? After all, it's not a very big state.
Most gay couples split up over sexual entanglements with a third party (or many
third parties), and safe sex has slowed the cruising to a screeching halt. Look
at all the empty bars! Look at all the empty spaces in public that were once filled
with practicing homosexuals. More are staying home today and watching television.
Or reading Blueboy.
There is a great fear of meeting someone new that you really like and finding
they are attached and just looking for a quick roll in the hay. If they are, you
have to consider how many people they've been rolling around with and if tfrey
are safe. You yourself will have to he safe at all costs because that is the way
it is today. When there are many repeated meetings between the same two people,
the question of safety has a tendency to become less important. That is a big
mistake ... let the buyer beware!
Roommates and lovers have been part of the gay population for as long as we can
remember. We have seen longer relationships and promiscuity has been observed
on a much less frequent basis. Fear? No. There simply isn't as much around as
there used to be. Less bars, less clubs, less parties, less dinners, less camping
trips, less traveling in groups. The action has slowed down and much of what is
left is indoors, over a book, a magazine, a television show, ... a computer, cyberspace,
Internet, video-conferencing, telephone conferencing, etc. In a survey taken recently
by a large book selling vendor, statistics showed that readership is up in every
category surveyed. That too is contributed to the fact that couples are staying
together longer. They are staying home longer than usual and getting into much
less trouble. Some cheating does exist in cyberspace, with unknown connections,
but it's different. There is sexual conversation and masturbation during or after,
but then the cheater turns off his computer and goes to bed. And if his lover
wants sex, he merely has to use the standard heterosexual phrase:
"Not tonight, honey. I have a headache."
Chuck Edwards, Editor-in-Chief
