FEATURES
82 Avril Rocks!
The bratty punker grows up, talks about her new tour and current CD, and turns
the sexy toll. (Warning:"Girlfriend" will be stuck in your head days
after readingthis interview.)
98 Guy's Anatomy: The HUmma-porn-star">Uman Body—A User's Guide
Everything you everwanted to know about your slimy innards (and a bunch of stuff
you'll wish you didn't).
98 D.C. Smackdown!
Forget the election-year rhetoric: We put Democrats and Republicans through a
trial by fire and endurance to determine the ballsiest party in Washington.
104 Icon: Martin Lawrence
The movie bad boy tells us what he's been up to since he went oh-so-crazy a few
years back. Hint:There's some screwing involved! BY ERIC SPITZNAGEL
106 Danneel Harris
The smoking-hot One Tree Hill star lets her freak flag fly inthe long-awaited
White Castle sequel, Harold & KUmma-porn-star">Umar Escape From Guantanamo Bay. BY MIKE OLSON
112 I American Ugly
Does your face make babies cry? Cheer up and learn how the less than beautiful
are getting more than paid for their unique physiques. BY FRANK OWEN
116 Murder Girls
The shocking story of two teenage girls in love, a bond that grew stronger and
more delusional each day, and the seriously unluckyfamilymembers who tried to
keep the lovers apart. By SIMON COOPER
DEPARTMENTS
22 Letters
Your thoughts on Maxims gone by (mostly ofthe "searing rage" variety)
and a seriously jacked-up marathoner.
28 Incoming
The greatest Final Four bracket ever, the hottest newsbabes of fair-and-balanced
TV, and a sizzling side of bacon porn.
45 Rated
10,000 B.C. rises again, we go on the set of HUmma-porn-star">Uman Giant, and Taryn Southern's
one hot reason to see Deep in the Valley.
69 Columns
Sex: Porn, girls like it!
Food: GeneralTso's, we love it!
Health: Medical marijuana, we're on it!
124 Expert
Rock spring break like a pro, drink fine wine on a hobo budget, and make your
own spy device.
132 Style
Hollywood's coolest directors showyou how to dress for action, and fourways to
instantly get your handsome on.
152 The Decider
The greatest man conundrum of all time: Should you have another slice of pizza?
Find out here.
