9 BITS & BITES
Crazy, Zany & Bizarre
15 RESTRICTED REVIEWS
19 SEX GUIDE:
Sex and Your Senses by Paul Brock
27 JUDY
Spreading Cheer
36 INTERVIEW: Seka
Pornographic Golden Girl by Steven Hale Becker
42 SEXOTICA
44 TORONTO: A HOOKER'S HEAVEN
Where to find the best —and worst—action by Cathal O'Connor
47 CHARLENE
The softest touch
56 SINNER OR SAINT
Sex problem, anyone? br Dr. Lawrence Schwab
61 BEAUTY QUEENS FROM AROUND THE WORLD
72 SWEET SHELLY
She can't get enough by Jon J. Ring
83 PAMELA
She'll do anything
91 EROTIC ENCOUNTERS Sister-in-law
by Fred Martin
93 STAR WHORES
Spaced-out space bunnies
PUBLISHER'S STATEMENT
The Ottawa Slowdown.
How it can be told! Revealed, exposed, publicly admitted, the dreadful secret
we've known all along: Civil servants don't work as hard as the rest of us!
The word comes from J J. Macdonnell, the Auditor-General, who has come out with
a report that shows that civil servants work at 60.8% of their capacity, compared
to 87.7% from the rest of us. Or to put it another way, if the government workers
could be jacked up to a mere 80% efficiency, 38,000 people could do the work that
it now takes 50,000 to do.
Now, if you've ever taken a trip to Ottawa, or if, God forbid, you live in Ottawa,
this will come as no big surprise. For those of you who don't know the EnChanted
Kingdom first hand (and if there isn't a fairy tale about a town that goes to
sleep for a hundred years, there ought to be, because Ottawa is it) let me lay
it out. First: time slows down in government offices. Here at RUSTLER, when we
need something — an article or a piece of artwork — we need it NOW.
I talk to a member of my staff and he does it himself, or he calls a freelancer.
Either way, it's ready fast. If it isn't ready fast, the magazine is late getting
to you and that means less money and maybe a lost job for us.
In the government, if you need something you write your requisition on a form,
the mail boy picks it up on his appointed rounds and, eventually, delivers it
to Purchasing. They process it, okay the money and pass the paper on to the supplier.
Eventually, you get what you need — like two weeks later . . . if you're
lucky! Living like this, nine to five, five days a week, does things to people.
They start relating to that time frame; they slow down to match and bang goes
your efficiency.
Second: The civil service really does go by the book. There's a rule for every
situation and a traditional way to do everything that needs to be done. So, even
when you know the shortcuts, you end up going the long way around. In practice,
this means everything in writing and authorized by a higher-up. More inefficiency.
And that does something to the people involved. Ottawa is a good middle-class
town, with two good universities. Bright kids turn into bright graduates. Then
they go to the civil service and die.
What else can they do? The government doesn't particularly want the brilliance
and initiative they've struggled to acquire. It only wants "Do what we tell
you the way we tell you to do it." Result: worker hates job. Twenty-five
years later: worker still hates job, but now knows nothing else. Inefficiency
multiplied.
That is at least part of the reason the civil service is so slow, ponderous and
wasteful. And I'll tell you something: it's going to stay like that. Until it
faces real economic pressure to produce and until it offers some reward for initiative
and imagination, the civil service will stay exactly as it is. No amount of cutbacks
can change that.
