FEATURES
78 The 15th Annual.Car Special: Auto Eroticism
We showcase the year's hottest new rides. From Porsche to Pontiac, these cars
are sweeter than mainlining Pixy Stix.
90 Escape from Satan's Barbecue
Two fire trucks went into the forest to combat a rampaging blaze. Only one came
out. A survivor's tale.
96 Brooke Langton
You've seen her on TV's Melrose Place and The Net, you can see her this month
with Keanu on the big screen in The Replacements, and now you'll see her shopping
for a new shower on our pages.
102 Sports Bar Exam
Test your athletic IQ with our twisted test and have reason to feel good about
the overwhelming prominence of SportsCenter in your life.
110 Kristina Rostad
Hyperbeautiful model Kristina recently graduated magna-cum-ohlaudy! She thinks
that knowledge is sexy. See her use that knowledge in a bikini.
118 The 50 Most Annoying Things Ever
Small dogs. Men in clogs. Garth Brooks as Chris Gaines. England—it's the
new France. Already squirming, aren't you? See if you can stand the whole list.
DEPARTMENTS
20 Letters
You write 'em, we smite 'em.
24 True Lies
"So this guy's in bed with a cantaloupe..."
26 Blitz! Samantha Fox, robotic dogs fighting a poodle, killers named Wayne, blow-job candy,
SPAM art, a stripper doll and cheese—lots of cheese.
50 Hype!
A long swig of Coco Lee, a Spina Tap exam and the hottest new movies, games and
tunes.
64 Smart Bombs
How to make her do your bidding, goof around on your computer without getting
caught and chop wood the Shaolin way.
12 Greatest American Hero
Sneakier than Bubba, meaner than Judge Judy: Meet VP Aaron Burr, the man who iced
a founding father.
74 The Powder Room
Four women reveal the ins and outs and ins again of watching porn.
163 Where to Buy
If you want it, come and get it.
164 You Go, Girl!
Shield your eyes—it's Ali Landry!
