FEATURES
74 J.Lo Shots Jennifer Lopez is a triple threat: She can sing, she can act and she can singe
your synapses with a flash of her flesh. We've got the photos to prove it. Plus,
an interview, too!
90 The Philosophy First-Aid Kit
Slather some ointment on your festering soul as smart dead guys in togas help
you grapple with mortality, injustice, failure and your receding hairline.
96 Find Anyone—Or Lose Yourself
That friend who owes you lunch? Track him down with tips from a professional manhunter.
Then learn how to disappear with advice from a former fugitive.
106 Never Meet Her Parents
Learn the ancient art of relationship self- defense, thanks to our black-belt
course on how to toss aside nasty obligations.
114 Itching for Justice
Our reporter gets bitten by the Tick, aka Patrick Warburton, and joins the former
Seinfeld star on a quest for ice cream and vengeance.
120 Amazing Things
Deadly dragons! The Million-Volt Man! Ye gods! I'm as Snorkels! Spoons! And hard
as a rock other miracles of the modern world. Stand over a pillow: Your jaw's
about to drop.
128 Bahama-rama
Two women. Two tiny bikinis. One beach. Eight pages of big photos. Who loves you?
DEPARTMENTS
24 Dear Stuff
Let the healing begin.
28 True Lies
"When I hung up the phone, I realized that I had left a stack hard-core porno
mags in the back of my closet...."
30 Blitz!
Tennis pro or porn star? Plus: the WNBA, Justine Bateman, horny peacocks and the
Brain Bank, where you lose interest after you make a deposit.
52 Hype!
Box-office bombs, Killer Klowns, real-life action heroes and the Crystal Method.
Plus a little thing we like to call "etc."
72 Greatest American Hero
Who combines speed, barbiturates, violence, jail time and a boy named Sue? Yes,
it's the Johnny Cash story!
141 Instant Cool
Tailgating: A lost art or the sport of beer- addled rednecks? Both! Plus a new
BMW. Remember, drinking and driving don't mix. Passengers: Drink up!
184 The Sex Spy
Four women reveal how you can find their real "Geeeee!" spots. Hint:
There are two of them. And they rhyme with knipples.
192 Smart Bombs
Monkey-sex ed, Tang, bartender pickup tips and what happens when you get shot,
apart from the heartbreak of stubborn laundry stains.
202 Where to Buy
Don't wander aimlessly
204 E-mail Origins
It's funnier than you'd think. ;-)
