FEATURES
12 Cover Girl: Pamela Anderson
You think you know all there is to know? You think you've seen all there is to see? You've got some growing up to do, fella. Those slow-mo Baywatch shots
are nothing compared with what we got when the V.I.P. star sat still for us.
84 Craziest Conspiracies
Our paranoid reporter attended a conspiracy-theorist convention to learn the
Truth. Predictably, it involves alien lizards and Huey Lewis.
90 Real World Girl
The hottest thing in the latest Real World house? Lori. The second hottest thing?
The halogen lamp.
96 Seven Years on the Toilet
And 56 other startling ways that you're wasting your life.
98 Celebrity Stalking Made Easy
We tail Andy Dick...as he tails an unsuspecting citizen. Learn from his mistakes
and his keen fashion sense.
104 Freak Accidents
No, not accidents that are freakish— accidents involving freaks.
110 The Sex Power List
The 69 most influential people, places and battery-powered things in the world
of sex.
122 Anarchy in the USA
What do you do when you want to bring down the system? Join the chaotic, meeting-filled
war against globalism!
DEPARTMENTS
18 Dear Stuff
Cries for help that we Kappily ignore.
22 True Lies
"Afterward, I heard one of the girls whisper, 'We just had sex with Adam
Sandler!"' And other shocking stories.
24 Blitz!
Billy Bob's new album, cute currencies, odds on the Bush twins, barbecued rat
and a man who's half Mexican, half chair and all love.
50 Hype!
Forgotten TV characters, Klingon vocabulary, Stereolab, The Godfather on DVD,
a 2003 movie preview and other junk we can't remember right now.
70 Greatest American Hero
Our favorite Rat Packer/cool-ass crooner, Dean Martin, drank from the cup of
life. And then he just drank. A lot.
131 Instant Cool
High Definition TVs, recliners, gin, martini glasses and a home theater in a
box—aka the ingredients of paradise.
164 The Sex Spy
Eavesdrop on four women talking about sexual taboos—where not to put it,
what not to use while putting it, how not to ask to put it....Of course, we're
talking about that nice new sofa you got at IKEA.
174 Smart Bombs
How to withstand torture, count cards in blackjack and operate a jet pack. Everything
you need to lead a boring life!
186 Where to Buy
You've got to spend your cash on something besides medication.
188 Where Stuff Comes From
STUFF STYLE
141 Fashion News
Part of our continuing war on nudity.
148 Foreign Affairs
A guy, a girl, new threads and traffic!
154 Kill lack Frost!
...with fall coats and lots of love.
156 Tube Tops
You watch 'em on TV—now watch 'em wearing nice, comfy clothes.
