6 Avy
Two words: fucking hot!
4 Letters
Pure postal porking!
16 Jodi & Rick
Love, and jizz, is in the air!
30 Bad Asses
Tougher than you, doughboy!
34 Jana
All spread and ready!
44 How-To
Toys for Twats!
46 Jessie & Jezebell
I think they like each other?
60 Jizz Bizz
Who's banging who!
63 Trixi
She's got something ip her sleave!
70 Stuff
It's on everybody's hopping list!
72 Bridgette
A delicious pussy picnic in the park!
80 Tales Of The Unexplained
A picture s worth a thousand screams!
83 Julianne
I think I'm in love!
90 Borneo
Musn't lose one's head!
92 Vanessa
Pretty in pink!
101 Pranks
Funnier than a sack of comedians!
102 Quickies
Ridiculous, but true, stories!
104 Angelina, Mia & Jeff
Four tits, two pussies, one dick!
118 XXX Review
Frame-by-frame filth!
134 Houston
Give it up for the hardcore queen!
187 Ashley, Chantelle-fontain-porn-star">Rebecca & Jenifer
Look ma, no tan lines!
Editorial Note
Why is it every time I use the leafblower, some smart-ass comes up with a witty
quip like, "So you blew the front yard?" Chuckle, chuckle. Yeah, that's
exactly what I did. Or every time I go down to the docks and try and hustle an
extra 50, they're like, "Down at the docks, eh? You blow any sailors?"
It's like, dude, grow up! And why is it every-time I have to write this page,
I have no idea what to say? I'm ashamed of myself right now. Probably shouldn't
have drank all that cough medicine before I got here.
Wait a minute! I know what to say! This month, the obvious female beauty that
surrounds us can only be found in SWANK! See Jodi, Jana, Avy, and Vanessa exude
nothing but natural sexual splendor! Drink deeply from the foxy fountains that
are Briagette, Jessie and Jezebelle! Then witness the breathtaking glory of Ashley,
Chantelle-fontain-porn-star">Rebecca, and Jennifer's red-hot threesome!
And when you're done with the exquisite photos of our SWANK cuties, see the creepy
pics of some photogenic phantoms in Tales of the Unexplained's "Pictures
Don't Lie!" The dead want you to have one more little something to remember
them by, maybe in a wallet-size! So, sit down, smile pretty, and say "scream!"
er, "cheese!"
Speaking of pictures, they say any one is worth a thousand words. Well, that's
at least a thousand percent true in this case! Check out "How I Almost Lost
My Head In Borneo!" and get into the finer points of dealing with a headhunting
host! Bizarre photos of unlucky people who forgot their manners and how to avoid
meeting a similar fate! Plus, dinner menu do's and don'ts whilst in a headhunting
country! Surprisingly, the cat tastes like, well, cat.
Then, as if we didn't just save your life from headhunters, we present to you,
your majesty, Bad Motherfuckers— this time, it's a list of the toughest
mofo's in movie history! All this, plus Jokes, Quickies, Letters, Stuff, Jizz
Bizz, How To, our XXX Reviews and more, more, more! Yeah, we're talking to you.
You're the only one here.
—The Editors
